


And It All Just Fell Apart

by orphan_account



Category: Mindhunter (TV 2017)
Genre: M/M, This Is A Disaster, age gap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-02 12:23:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13318017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "Faunlet" Holden Ford Ruins Agent Bill Tench’s Life.





	And It All Just Fell Apart

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY BEFORE YOU JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS THIS ISN'T WHAT YOU THINK. I'm not /that/ evil.

29 is still pretty young. Sure, Bill wasn’t all that old—only 44… But 29 still felts so god damn young in comparison. Holden still felt like a damn kid. 15 years his junior.  And it wasn’t just his age… Hell, Tench wouldn’t even have really reflected on the other’s age if it wasn’t for his demeanor and general recently developed brattiness. The thing was so: At first, there was his curiosity and nativity that was easy to notice. Holden was kind of refreshing at first, till it got on Bill’s nerves. The way he just started disregarding everything else and just doing things “that got results.” The god damn way he just didn’t respect authority.

It was a jarring change, but somehow it bothered Tench till late into the night. Somehow, he couldn’t place his finger on why until Holden was harassing the god damn principal for tickling children’s feet. As fucked up as that was Bill tried to not think of it. But then again it was difficult when his brain remembered Nabokov…

He just couldn’t fucking believe it—did he subconsciously think of Holden fucking Ford as a faunlet? Really? No, no, no. There wasn’t anything alluring about that asshole. He was a giant pain in the ass.

And Bill would be happy to forget about this…till that shit-stain Speck called Holden a little boy. A fucking little boy. The disbelief was strong on his face, so was the irritation and questioning if this motherfucker was serious.

But that just sent Bill on a whole other turmoil.

So it wasn’t just him? Other people saw it, too. They thought Holden had some childlike qualities… Okay, that wasn’t mind-blowing, what was that Bill fixated on this. It’s somewhere when Bill’s in his god damn fucking office, alone, that he finds himself staring at the cards hanging on the wall. All from Kemper. All dedicated to Holden. And it snaps in Bill’s head right then and there. He concludes – “Okay. I am attracted to the absolute bastard that is Holden Ford. What now?”

And yes, at least he feels it in his gut that it isn’t the aspect of Holden being a kid in his eyes, it’s the charm of it all…Or so he hopes.

He’s all alone in the basement, he’s working late. Much too late… It’s past midnight. But he’s working late. Or so you could call it if staring at the wall could classify as work. And he’s contemplating it over and over again. Trying to decide what the next logical step in this nightmare is. Sure, his family was falling apart, but he’d rather attempt to fix it than move on to be alone and with probably unrequited feelings for… a man. Hell, a boy.

The phone rings. Bill picks up.

* * *

 

It took much too long and it felt way too slow, but he finally arrives at the hospital. Finally, fucking finally, sees Holden sitting on the bed. Sure it took a lot of flashing of his badge along the way, but here they are… An beyond belief pissed Bill in front of a seemingly frightened Holden.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” The older man doesn’t even attempt to hide the anger in his tone.

“Bill, I can explain—“

“Sure, Holden, fire away. Tell me just what the fuck was going through that wonder boy mind of yours when you decided that seeing Kemper all alone without informing anyone was a good idea.”

“I just…” He trails off. He’s trying to think of what to say, but it seems he’s drawing a blank because he looks up at Bill with pleading eyes.

“Jesus, Holden… You could have been killed…” Bill says, and this tone is softer. Voice weaker, even. It’s shameful, there hasn’t been that long since the realization but he’s already all fucked up? What the hell Bill Tench, I thought you were a bigger man than this. “Not to mention what he would have done to your fucking corpse.” He says in an attempt to regain composure.

There’s quiet and eventually, Bill moves to a chair next to the bed. Or he tries, but before he can sit down Holden mutters something.

“What?”

“Bill, I wouldn’t normally ask this…but can you hold me?” There must be absolute shock on the other’s face then because Ford begins to explain. “When I got there…before I lost it… Kemper hugged me. I can’t get that fucking feeling to go away, Bill, it feels like freaking spiders all over me.”

There’s silence for a couple of seconds before the word ‘please’ rings from the younger man.

Bill blinks.

“Okay.”

He carefully approaches, glances at the door to make sure nobody is coming and sits down at the side of the bed. Leans in and hugs Holden. The other moves into the touch, practically nuzzling the older agent. This feels too intimate, too wrong. Like Bill shouldn’t be doing this like this is the greatest betrayal to Nancy he could pull. Like there wasn’t something worse he could possibly do… But they stay like that for a while.

“Thank you, Bill.” Holden eventually says.

“No problem, k—“He can’t say it. He fucking can’t. Even if everything in his body is thinking it, it doesn’t feel right… Not at all.

Ford pulls away, glancing up at Bill with full concern. Totally misplaced for who the concern should be directed at in this situation.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” Bill gets off the bed and into the chair, takes out his packet of cigarettes and lights one. As he begins what will be a long night of chain-smoking, he looks over the other.

“Did you sleep at all?”

“…No.”

“Well then, you should probably try to get some rest.”

Holden nods before lying down and closing his eyes. Bill’s on his second cig when he realizes the other must be definitely passed out.

But either way, fuck…this was not good or even remotely fair. He never asked to find out he’s into somebody like Ford, yet here he is.

Suppose life just was like that…

Either way, now Bill definitely was sure Holden will be the end of him.


End file.
